I follow a couple different Bullet Journaling groups online for organization layout ideas. Wow, what a nerdy way to start an entry. Ha!  (If you haven’t heard of bullet journaling, you should check it out. It’s a great system to stay organized!) As the new year was approaching and everyone was setting up their brand new journals, there was quite a hubbub about what everyone will choose as their word of the year.

Essentially, you pick a single word that sets your intention for the year. It’s usually one that’s positive or motivating in nature. It’s very personal and your word depends purely on what your individual goals are. Then it usually gets a prominent decorated position at the front of your journal as a reminder throughout the year to keep working towards your goal. Something like this never appealed to me. I could never find a singular word that accurately sums up my life. However, I came across a rather intriguing new term about a month ago that stuck with me so I unexpectedly found my word for  2018.

In early December, my mother-in-law fell ill and had to have emergency surgery. It all happened so quickly, leaving us feeling worried and anxious. (Just so you don’t worry as you read this post– the surgery went well, she did great, and is on her way to full recovery. ☺) While she was in surgery and we were waiting for an update, I made my way to the hospital chapel. Even though I was raised Catholic and consider myself a spiritual person, I don’t practice religion regularly. It was kind of an unusual place for me to seek out. I guess I needed a little more support that day from a higher being.

After I said a little prayer for my mother-in-law and for the doctors performing the surgery, I spent some time reflecting on everything else that was going on in my life. I randomly reached for a nearby booklet, flipped to the daily reading, and found that was titled “Imperfect, but loved” and discussed the Japanese term “wakeari.” It was exactly what I needed to read at that moment.

 

The Japanese pride themselves in preparing and packaging food perfectly. Anything that has a blemish or a defect is often discarded. These slightly imperfect pieces are known as wakeari. There’s a popularity in markets for wakeari items that are sold at a cheaper price “for a reason,” such as  a broken cookie. Still good, just not perfect. Wakeari is also used as a catchphrase in Japan to refer to people who are considered less than perfect.

You may be thinking, “So why did you connect so much to wakeari, Audrey? I don’t get it.” I know it sounds like quite a silly stretch to equate a whole upcoming year to broken cookies, but hear me out.

I used to be the biggest perfectionist ever. Nerdy from a young age, I used to get perfect scores on all of my tests in school, and it came easily to me.  I always had to have perfect technique in my dance classes or I’d get upset. I had to leave my piano lessons every week with a gold star in my notebook. I had to be a starting player and score the most points in every soccer and basketball game. Yeah, I was competitive. That’s not to say I didn’t have fun doing all of these things. I had a ton of fun and learned a lot, of course. But I had a mindset that respect and admiration only came if you were 1st or near the top.

As I got older and my world got larger, it wasn’t as easy to be perfect. I met smarter kids who got better grades, who played piano and danced better than me, or were better athletes. My confidence lowered and I would only share the happy perfect parts of my life, and then quietly pack away any imperfections or insecurities. I’d keep them to myself as if they were things to be ashamed of and rarely showed a vulnerable moment even with my closest friends.

Now as an adult, I’ve learned that was a really unhealthy way to approach life. A very wise person explained it so simply and clearly to me, “Audrey, perfect is poopy.” 😉 It’s funny, because it’s true. It sure is poopy. Think about it. It’s a lot of work and energy put towards an impossible goal that often ends in disappointment. I learned it’s okay to embrace and even love my flaws. And as I learned from my favorite researcher and author, Brene Brown,

“Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.”

So 2018 will be about accepting imperfection – my own and others’. I won’t be hypocritical and pretend my life is perfectly put together all the time because it’s not. I mean, whose life is? I’ll show acceptance and love towards anyone else who may feel flawed or insecure. I will welcome them into my business with open arms.

• Your kid doesn’t want to pose and would rather run off and explore? That’s cool. Let’s photograph him and his inquisitive nature.
• Your baby doesn’t want to leave mama’s arms the entire session? That’s great. Let’s capture that bond and the sweet cuddly moments instead.
• Dad forgot his dress shoes at home? Sneakers are fine! Let’s shoot him playing tag with the kiddos. It’s all good.
  

  This is your family, you don’t have to fit any specific form or hit a perfect pose with me. Your imperfections are what makes your family beautiful and perfect as is. This is your story. We got this.

As for wakeari’s other meaning? There is definite motivation for my photography and business to be out there “for a reason” and “with a purpose.” My first purpose is, of course, giving my clients beautiful art to have as family heirlooms. My business is mature enough that I think that part comes quite easily. Now I can focus more time and energy into ideas for using my photography to contribute to my community or a charitable cause. I feel it’s important to always make time for that. And if I can incorporate that into my business this year, I’ll consider 2018 a great success.

Here’s to a embracing imperfection and having a purposeful year!

What’s your word of the year?

xoxo,
Aud